Please Proof-Read my short essay? related questions

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Please Proof-Read my short essay?0cbarnett2012-10-22 14:08:59
I'm not good at grammar or punctuation so please proof read this. I would greatly appreciate it! MedlinePlus I have not written the end, however, any advice on how I should write would be greatly appreciated too! MedlinePlus :) here is my short essay: MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Music Therapist MedlinePlus The race that interested me was the music therapy because I love all kinds of music and I have the desire to help people. I like the fact that music has the power to help people in need. Unlike traditional therapy, music therapy can be prescribed to anyone. It can help people, young and old, and people with disabilities. Even patients who are deaf can attend music therapy. What really surprised me was that a woman who gives birth to three children took no painkillers, but listened to music for pain relief MedlinePlus. The duty of a music therapist is to maintain mental health, emotional and spiritual support to the patient. They determine what to do based on the patient's medical history and talking with family members to get a good idea of ​​what to do to help the patient. Each patient likes and reacts to different types of music. The therapist also allows the patient to play a musical instrument with music. Holding the instrument correctly is considered a big step and success. They also allow some patients to create their own music. For someone to become a music therapist must have a bachelor's degree. Some courses recommended for someone looking to become a music therapist include music theory, psychology and human development. The salary of a music therapist hovers around $ 39,930 a year. The average salary hourly earnings of $ 19.20. The picture is rather stable labor in 2008 was about 23,280. Employment statistics say that the rate of growth of music therapists from 2008-2018 will a14.60% growth rate. Some public schools in North Carolina, as Swansboro High School offers courses related to music therapy and music theory and AP psychology. There are three schools of music theory in North Carolina that are East Carolina University, Appalachian State University and Queens University of Charlotte. Appalachian State University is the largest music school of therapy in North Carolina. In 2009, 13 students graduated with a music therapy degree ASU. There are an estimated 450 music therapists currently working in North Carolina.
Please proof read and criticize my essay, it is due today and the extra help is very much appreciated?0lenny2012-10-11 19:34:21
MedlinePlus children serving sentences of Adults Between 1992 and 1998, forty-nine states passed laws making it easier to convict juveniles as adults. Why would a young man called only when an adult commits an offense if it works in the favor tax? Many teens are taken to court for alcohol, why were not treated as adults? The answer is obvious, it would be a crime if they were tried as adults, the prosecutor would not be able to win the case. There is just no way for the court system to charge the teens as adults if teenagers do not have the same rights as adults. Teenagers do not have a complete understanding of what will happen as a result of their actions. They may be more educated than some adults, but do not have their wisdom. MedlinePlus Vincent Culotta, Maryland neuropsychologist who specializes in disorders of brain development, says: "Research shows that the human brain continues to develop until at least 25 years of age, in contrast to the previous belief that brain development stops at 16. For some teens, especially those who have experienced severe abuse or malnutrition, this process may be slower than normal. "justice system should take brain biology and psychology into account in deciding to what extent a teenager can be held responsible for a crime. In trying juveniles as adults, the judicial system is not helping our children but harm. Juveniles in prison as adults are eight times more likely to be sexually assaulted and are more likely to commit suicide. In addition, studies show that trying juveniles as adults can actually lead to higher rates of recidivism. We take kids who need help, they need positive reinforcement, and put them in a negative environment without a second chance. One mistake can cause a lifetime of pain and confinement. In many cases, children should not be the only ones to blame. MedlinePlus In 1998, Melvin Douglas Fitzgerald Jr. pleaded guilty in the Circuit Court of Roanoke to rob another teen at gunpoint, no one was hurt. He was the only one of the five teenagers involved in the theft of receiving an adult sentence. Douglas had a troubled history in the juvenile system, and at a young age of fifteen, he was sent directly to an adult penitentiary for two years. He was eight years hanging over his head.
Based on this (short!) essay, if you were a scholarship essay reader, would you give me a grant?3lu lu2018-07-24 05:05:52
Oh, and any ideas for a good title? Thanks in advance for your reading, not very long. MedlinePlus -------------------- MedlinePlus I was supposed to answer the questions: MedlinePlus one. Why are you applying for this scholarship? MedlinePlus b. What accomplishments make him deserving of financial assistance? MedlinePlus c. What are your career goals? MedlinePlus ------------ MedlinePlus Ok here it is: MedlinePlus MedlinePlus My dream is to be an ABA (Applied Behavior Analysis) therapist who specializes in children with autism. Autistic children can be some of the sweetest kids you never know, but unfortunately, its true capabilities are usually buried under the disease, so they need therapy to help unleash their potential. I chose to pursue this career not for salary or because autism is the fastest growing disability in development in the United States, but for a more personal reason: I have three cousins ​​with autism. MedlinePlus I spent the summer of 2007 working as a nanny for two of them, trying to raise money for college. It was very interesting to see how their lives changed by autism that next summer, I found a job at an ABA therapy for autistic children. I loved it and gave me a desperately needed financial opportunity, the beginning of my third year in college (fall 2009) is when my parents will withdraw all financial support from me and fully expected to live on my own. MedlinePlus I am currently a sophomore in the second semester, majoring in Psychology with hopes of eventually becoming an ABA therapist. In the little time I have left, while I'm still financially secure, I am looking for the most effective ways to earn money as possible, I have to be able to pay for school while still having enough money to live on half of come fall. In order to be able to secure scholarships, I turn my attention almost exclusively to my notes and doing well in my classes - and is certainly paying off: last semester I gained an average of 3.93 and a member the Phi Beta Kappa national honor society. MedlinePlus I am still very concerned, however, because if it is I have to choose between buying food or finish college, I will have no choice but to leave school. I'm working hard to earn money as possible, but I need all the help they can financially, or who may have to make the painful decision to leave school (and essentially my dream job) so I can afford the necessities Basic. If I can finish school, I can not find work as ABA therapist, and bring hope to many autistic children as possible, not only my cousin, but all of them. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus ------------- MedlinePlus Thank you very much for reading this!
Was I short and to the point with my '250 or less' essay?1shandell2012-10-11 12:11:03
• Describe your educational career and life goals . Explain your plan to achieve these goals . Include your degree / major , why they selected , and how this degree / major will help you achieve your goals . MedlinePlus MedlinePlus MedlinePlus One of my English teachers told me I had to be brief and to the point with my essay , but there is something I 'm not sure , do not feel you are ready . MedlinePlus MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Choosing a College Alamo was an easy decision , with the right mindset and proper preparation and habits on a daily basis , I can achieve my goal of getting my associate and move to a university to pursue a degree. I chose psychology as my major , for many reasons , one of the main reasons is that I love learning how the human mind works . I love knowing that most of the things we try in life if we are successful or not fixed within our own minds . I know through the psychology that I can learn more about my own personality mindset and how I teach something new every day . We control our own destiny , which links to my goal of just being happy. I want to be happy when I look back on my life and be happy for me is to eventually become somebody and be proud of myself .
Was I short and to the point with my '250 or less' essay?1lenni2012-10-03 07:50:04
• Describe your educational career and life goals . Explain your plan to achieve these goals . Include your degree / major , why they selected , and how this degree / major will help you achieve your goals . MedlinePlus MedlinePlus MedlinePlus One of my English teachers told me I had to be brief and to the point with my essay , but there is something I 'm not sure , do not feel you are ready . MedlinePlus MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Choosing a College Alamo was an easy decision , with the right mindset and proper preparation and habits on a daily basis , I can achieve my goal of getting my associate and move to a university to pursue a degree. I chose psychology as my major , for many reasons , one of the main reasons is that I love learning how the human mind works . I love knowing that most of the things we try in life if we are successful or not fixed within our own minds . I know through the psychology that I can learn more about my own personality mindset and how I teach something new every day . We control our own destiny , which links to my goal of just being happy. I want to be happy when I look back on my life and be happy for me is to eventually become somebody and be proud of myself .
HELP!!! Please proof read my paper. ?1Charu2012-10-23 00:32:03
Have you been aware that education can take you to places you never imagined? Day after day, we see ads that illustrate that higher education can put in a higher position social business. For example, we find large signs at school saying: "Learn more to earn more". Many can agree or disagree with this statement, but in general, helps students to continue their education. For example, we see that most of the residents of Los Angeles embrace the diversity of college campuses to distinguish a good or bad instructor. Many people have found teaching rather boring, even to the point of falling asleep in class. So education pay off in the end? Knowledge is a smart investment and is necessary because individuals with the instructions have a higher chance of getting a good paying job, gain more power and discover a new world of emotions. MedlinePlus First, it is clear that higher education is needed to work in a well paid job. In order to obtain a doctoral degree or a master's degree, which is required for many professional jobs, schools require large investments of time and money. For example, my aunt spent many years getting a master's degree in psychology. Now she has a high salary working as a psychologist in Belmont MedlinePlus Molina 2 MedlinePlus High School. There are two main types of occupation: white collar and blue collar. Having a white collar job means you do not need a uniform. You work in an office or in a professional environment. Having a blue collar work refers to a worker as a leading mining mechanic work clothes often blue or khaki or specialized protective clothing. They may also have a speech unskilled and attitude. MedlinePlus Moreover, educated people understand that their knowledge complementary shows more power. According to Webster, the power, the ability to act or produce an effect, authority, control, or a sovereign state. A good example of a man who uses education to gain power is Malcolm X. As a Muslim leader, Malcolm X got a huge following who gave the order. He was able to produce an effect when a disciple was severely injured and not receiving the best health care. Using his knowledge of rights and laws, Malcolm X said that the authorities issued their students the best possible care. However, having a large amount of energy is negligible in many cases. Many people use the power in a negative way. For example, Paris Hilton has wasted his power and money in nonsense. In the Bible, King Solomon wisdom used to expand the kingdom of Israel. Having wisdom with power is the answer to many of our problems. MedlinePlus In addition, the learning students can open a new world of emotions. Malcolm X said to himself, "that among the teachings of Mr. Muhammad, Molina 3 MedlinePlus my correspondence, my visitors, and my reading of books, months passed without my even thinking about being imprisoned. While in prison for many years and stimulating your mind through learning encyclopedic learned to free themselves from their environment. In my life, educate myself about the Bible has opened my eyes to what is the truth about life. The same happens when a student opens a book and learn. When these students are challenged, obviously our campuses will be full of excitement for life. MedlinePlus In conclusion, in addition to investing in education has a positive effect. A person can see a clearer picture of where they want to be in their company. You might be able to make wiser decisions not only about what career they plan to take, but also a wiser decision of his life when it comes to your health and your family. It is time for us, as students, to devote our time and our future education. MedlinePlus
Can someone proof read this pleaseeeeeeee?0Zelda2012-10-03 06:28:28
During the 20th century across the development of inventions and theories that have improved the quality of life was typical. Many men have devoted their lives to research in order to celebrate an achievement of everyday remembrance as well as providing useful information that will advance us in the future. For example Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychology, not only advanced his period, but inspired many others to follow their analysis and expand their theories. Experimentation Mr. Freud in analyzing "conscious and unconscious" and Dream made an impact on society and changed the idea of ​​the human mind forever. MedlinePlus Sigmund Freud was born in Freiberg, Moravia, May 6, 1856. He was Jewish and his family lived in an area that had a high Jewish population, called Leopoldstadt neighborhood. He lived with his parents five sisters and a brother not including himself, the living conditions were extremely narrow. Freud began his studies at a local elementary school, and then attended the Sperl Gymnasium, an institution that prepares students for college. He studied several languages, history, mathematics and science. He later attended the University of Vienna in Austria, where he began his medical studies. MedlinePlus Sigmund Freud receive a doctoral degree in medicine, he decided to open his own practice in the treatment of psychological disorders, which gave much of the clinical material is based most of his theories and studies. He began to question the basic ideas about the human mind, he believed that the human brain is divided into two. One side was called the unconscious mind this side had a strong influence on the individual's everyday behavior. The idea of ​​a person having a phobia can be found in the subconscious side of the brain. Freud also believed that the tension between the demands of civilized society caused psychological and physical diseases. Another achievement was Sigmund Freud's dream analysis. The Interpretation of Dreams contains some of his best works also one of its most successful and well-known illustration. According to Freud's dreams are the most important part of the mind, there is no sense random events, but a message from the unconscious. A dream tells us things about ourselves, fears or desires that are usually aware, making it known through dreams. For Freud, dreams were about wish fulfillment, even dreams that involved punishment is a form of wish-fulfillment as well. Many of the theories of Sigmund Freud and the studies involved the development of man and his mentality. MedlinePlus A turning point in the life of Sigmund Freud was in 1923 he was diagnosed with cancer of the jaw due to their smoking habits. Freud went through several surgeries that made life impossible. Eating and speaking became a nuisance and is estimated to have about 33 operations. Freud had undergone two operations in England at the time he was 82 and in February 1939 the cancer was found again if the surgeons called "inoperable and incurable." Freud suffered severe pain and asked his doctor for a dose large enough morphine to ease his pain and kill him quickly. Freud died on September 23, 1939 was cremated three days. Sigmund Freud sixth and last daughter Anna Freud continued his work unfinished. MedlinePlus Sigmund Freud can be described as a man determined, intelligent history in the 20th century his theory has had a major impact on his century and continues to our improvement. His analysis of the human mind has enabled scientist to demonstrate next reason of mental illness, a phobia or how to interpret dreams. Its impact on society will never be forgotten he will remain the father of psychology.
Someone please proof read this or a few paragraphs. Thanks!?1jejel2012-10-15 18:28:04
So now we know why most people choose to conform to the rules and follow the rules of the other, but why some decide to rebel and do the opposite of everyone else? Is it the result of micro management and the loss of a sense of control over our lives? Rich Barbera believes that this is true. Rich Barbera recently retired after 30 years as a high school counselor in New Fairfield, Connecticut. "He welcomes parental involvement and wishes there was more of it in high school, and noted that some changes occur as a result. At school, for example, Advanced Placement courses are offered more as a result of parental requests. But also has seen its share of helicopter parents. Barbera has had parents come to your office to pick SAT applications for children who were not planning to go to college. had seen parents appear in the office the director of the university applications are completed for their children (Donna Krache, 2008). Mr. Barbera suggested adequate parental micro-management can be healthy for the child. But Mr. Barbera also says: " ... floating too can be counterproductive for the child and can lead to rebellion ... "Many sources confirm this theory." When children realize that their parents are micro managing them and acting with authority, often do not like to Parents and associate the bad behavior with parents. The child will continue the unwanted behavior when the parent is not. "(Psychology Ninth Edition, David G. Myers) These studies suggest people rebel because micro-management and this proves people due to rebel control. Many people want control over their lives and do not want to follow the easy listening. Although severe cases of control problems can lead to serious problems such as eating disorders. The common solution to the problems of rebellion or control is about the problem and work toward a solution with both parties. better parent or a leader is an authority figure in not an authoritarian. MedlinePlus Did you ever wonder why people act the way for some people but not others? Most people act differently to different people of different culture, race, sex, religion or gender. I'm talking about prejudice. Webster's dictionary describes as a bias, making a judgment or assumption about someone or something before having enough knowledge to be able to do so with guaranteed accuracy. Mr. Gallup conducted research on this topic. The following was found: a third of Americans told Gallup they would vote for a qualified woman nominated his party for president were the same sex and race and religion as the candidate (Gallup 2007). Support for racial contact form, including interracial marriage, has also increased dramatically. Almost all Americans can agree that everyone is equal and everyone should have the same opportunities. But strangely prejudice still exists in public opinion. In several U.S. states where black drivers are a minority of drivers on interstates fast, they are the majority who are stopped and searched for contraband! (Lamberth, 1998, Staples, 1999a, b) Apparently, law enforcement officials are not acting logically and are acting on their own prejudices. This may seem low, but if prejudices are the reasons behind our decisions then who knows many bets, bank loans, traffic stops, relationships and jobs are based on race, religion, body type, or culture and not on real facts and quantifiable data? Personally, I think our descicions small amounts are based on prejudice. However, decisions made are usually subconscious and decide based on inner emotions and feelings rooted deep, that could possibly be prejudice. For example, when a buyer is in the grocery store and looking for a product and see two sellers. The buyer can tell themelves go Caucasian male employee because it looks more professional, not the Indian female employee. But unconsciously I lied and the real reason I went for the white man is because they could relate to (if the buyer was a white male). Or the buyer could be avoided by indigenous women in the war because he thought about India and the September 11, 2002 attacks. Forty percent of Americans are uncomfortable with the middle-aft decent (Smelser and Mitchell, 2003). It is difficult to pinpoint one exact reason of our daily decisions, but prejudices often play a more important role than we think. MedlinePlus Social psychology is a complicated issue and can be a key player in our decisions and reasons. These players are, how they work and pears our decisions and choices they make, if we have to exercise a sense of control over our lives, and the emotions we feel towards certain ethnic groups, religions, races and genders. In conclusion, because my intention
Can someone please proof read this one page paper?1kimlang2012-10-21 18:41:04
My goals for this class MedlinePlus MedlinePlus The first day of my class that took place on September 16, 2011 in Psychology 107 gave me a tremendous impression and a great sense of curiosity of how this class will be for the entire semester. My main goal of this class is to be as funny as possible, to learn about child development from the core, because the race I chose Occupational Therapy involves especially in the field of psychology. Occupational Therapy involves learning new cognitive abilities after a dramatic disaster. MedlinePlus What I liked about the first day of class was what was well organized. Noting that 7 ½ months baby laughs because his father began to tear the paper made me realize how something new and exciting for a baby can be fun. The video made me happy all day because it made me think of me when I was little. Think critically, students listen and share your thoughts helps develop our skills development that I really like. By having something visual aids related to the topic will help us understand the issue we are discussing too. Share what's on our minds will help us expand and grow throughout our studies in psychology. MedlinePlus I hope to gain a lot of knowledge of this kind of psychology for use later in my future career. What I can expect from this class is to share my ideas and learn from my classmates and learn lessons from my teacher. The extent to which I can expect from this class depends on how I conducted throughout this class. I hope this class is fun and exciting as it was on our first day of class, which I really liked. I want to gain an understanding of infant, child and adolescent development along our class sessions. I hope to get a better understanding of this psychology class 107 both with my teacher and my classmates.
Can some one proof read my letter for school?0elza2012-10-22 04:49:29
This is a letter of readmission in my next semester by the Dean of my career, this is a draft, I would appreciate if someone could read the test of grammatical errors and give some advice on how to change or add anything to the letter. Also, does anyone know if I could talk to the dean of students at my university on my average on some form of academic fresh start by sending a letter or an e-mail explaining what happened while I was in school and see if there anything I can do to reappear in the spring semester to improve my GPA. Thank you! MedlinePlus MedlinePlus I am writing this letter on my own to gain re-entry into ______ University for the spring 2012 semester. I was put on academic suspension in the spring semester for breach of the requirements of SAP 2011. My poor academic semester while in school during that time was because I did not take advantage of the resources available at the school to help better while I was there. I take full responsibility for my school failure. This suspension was then lifted for the fall semester, so I was very grateful. I could not afford to re-register, however, because my financial aid had also been suspended. I did not adjust at first, I thought several ways to do better, and the result was that my grades improved steadily. I spent last semester taking 3 of the 4 courses they have failed. I have also changed the main MedlinePlus to Psychology. I have a game plan to improve, change and succeed. I know I can be a formidable presence and good academic performance in school. I only had to determine what tools I needed to help me succeed. Now I have the tools in my arsenal, and will be used in its entirety to help in my academic success at the University of ______ and additional professional success after graduation. MedlinePlus I am determined to take all necessary steps to ensure my success as a student at the University of ______. I'm not asking you to take the risk of giving me another chance without a clear academic plan. I decided to take the following measures to ensure better academic performance in the future in order to improve in my classes and reach a GPA not only in meeting SAP standards, but also to be eligible for graduation I want, and more a reflection of my own skills, I have formulated a plan to improve: MedlinePlus 1. Taking advantage of all the resources that are offered to me during the school year, including tutorials on the site for any issues you may be having problems. MedlinePlus 2. Maintain regular communication with my professors to evaluate my daily performance in class, attendance and participation in class exams. MedlinePlus 3. Working closely with a career counselor to trace my academic career and make sure I'm taking all the necessary steps towards my degree provided. MedlinePlus 4. Developing relationships with classmates and peers to form study groups to help myself and others focus on our weaknesses and find guidance in our strengths. MedlinePlus 5. I will attend my classes and my teachers notify a head of time if you have to miss a class to not fall behind in any of the course content. MedlinePlus 6. I will continue to focus and work hard to further improve my grades MedlinePlus I am determined to take all necessary steps to ensure my success as a student at the University of ______. My education is very important, not only for me but for my family. I have the greatest commitment to succeed. I hope you will give me another chance to prove, not only for the school and this committee, but also to myself that I have what it takes to be the best. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Thanks for your time and consideration.
Please comment on this short essay. 10 points will be given to the best answer!?2Poppy2012-10-05 21:57:04
Please comment short essay for a summer research program. I will vote for the best comment, though all comments are welcome! MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Here is the message: SROP aims to create access to education for students with diverse experiences and perspectives. Please describe your personal and academic goals. What is your motivation for seeking a research experience? SROP How can help you move towards your goals? Tell us about extracurricular activities for the recognition of their achievements. Limit your response to 250 words. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Bicultural am a woman, I see two different worlds. I was a mentor for a program that helped freshmen from historically underrepresented background to suit the academic and cultural life in my university. I'm currently making the first chapter of a Latino-oriented fraternity in my college campus. Now, I want to do some research on stereotypes, prejudice, discrimination, eyewitness testimony of children and healthy eating behaviors among Latinos. I remember the feeling of ecstasy I experienced when learning how social psychology experiments, helps us to understand the complexity of these issues. This caused my goal to become an experimental social psychologist to do these investigations. Finding the motivation to achieve my career goal, I set mini-goals and achieving them. For example, I took an independent study class to improve my writing skills after my psychology advisor informed me that my poor writing skills may prevent me from going to college and become an experimental psychologist. I am currently doing an internship now, in collaboration with the research of Professor Greenley in promoting adherence among children with chronic illnesses. Now, I have the intention to participate in the SROP program, another milestone for my career. The SROP program help me to continue doing what I do: get experience in research about my research interests, become a better candidate for college, and essentially become an experimental social psychologist.
Im writing an appeal to my financial aid office can someone proof read for me pleaseeeee? :)?0Lanell2012-10-25 23:26:46
Dear Office of Student Financial Aid, MedlinePlus My name is Monika Grabowska and I am writing to ask you to appeal my suspension of federal aid. The spring and summer semesters were a very stressful and overwhelming time in my life because I fractured a vertebrate in his back during those semesters. I was not able to walk or sit for long periods of time. He was supposed to have surgery and orthopedic consult a doctor but could not afford visits or surgery since both were a couple thousand dollars. At the same time, I had to take time off from work because I could not go to work or school with my back problem while she was trying to heal. When he returned to work I was working at Panera Bread instead of the city as a manger that was late and fifty or more hours a week. MedlinePlus I realize that I have neglected my studies and I would like another chance to do better in them. I've compiled a list of the steps I am taking to succeed in school: MedlinePlus 1. I left the job I had and now have a regular steady job Everglades Agricultural Machinery. MedlinePlus 2. My back has healed as much as possible, without surgery, I am able to move freely and resume all activities. Although carrying a back brace me for the times I do not mind. MedlinePlus 3. I'm getting a tutor for my hardest classes to become familiar with the tutoring center at school. MedlinePlus 4. I will talk to each of my instructors personally to know how I can do well in their classes. MedlinePlus 5. I will manage my time wisely so you can balance my work and study together. MedlinePlus 6. Attend all my classes to take advantage of what they have to offer. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus My goal is to earn a degree in psychology to help young adults with the struggles they are having on their lives. But I can only do it if I can apply for financial aid. I am a hard working student and I would like the opportunity to prove to you that my next semester will not be a disappointment. I will try my best to be a good example for my family and other students. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Please consider this letter and give me another chance to prove my dedication. MedlinePlus MedlinePlus Thanks for your time, MedlinePlus Monika Grabowska

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