How can I become motivated and passionate about something?

Answers:0   |   LastUpdateAt:2012-11-05 14:39:17  

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Jeet
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I am 20 years old, and I have been depressed and anxious for a long time. I also believe that I might have Avoidant Personality Disorder.

I don't want to take drugs, and I don't feel like there is any point to artificially making myself feel happy if my life still isn't going to amount to anything.

I am in college now, and as a junior, I still don't know what I want to do in terms of a career. One week I'll be set on something, and the next week it'll be something else. I've just decided to major in Psychology and to try to get into a PhD program, as I want to do something to help other people in a field that I know a lot about.

My problem is that I have a lot of social anxiety and am unable to pass any job interviews. Sometimes I feel like this problem will never go away, and I decide that I want to just quit college and get a full time job doing something boring like dishwashing, and use video games as my escape for the rest of my life. I can't imagine myself ever having a career or being in a position where I can be comfortable with myself.

And when I look back on times in my life, I realize that I could have done a lot of things to improve my situation and outlook on life. For example, I've been writing a novel for years now. I have told several people the idea of the novel, and they have been asking about it since then because they find it interesting. You'd think this would be a good source of motivation, right? Well, I've written a total of three paragraphs, because I find myself unable to become passionate about the story or anything at all. Without passion, I have no motivation.

Instead of going out and meeting people, exercising, and doing all the things that normal people like to do, I sit around in my dorm and worry. Instead of writing that novel, I spend my free time playing an online game where I literally just click on a monkey over and over again for hours on end to steal all of its money.

I was wondering if anyone had any advice on becoming passionate and motivated about something.

I'd appreciate it if you don't answer if you're just going to tell me:
-To go to a doctor or any type of counselor
-To call the suicide hotline (I am not suicidal)
-That I am any sort of evil or inconsiderate person for asking this question

Thanks in advance :)
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